Vanity googling

One of my resolutions in January was to find my roommate from study abroad in Rome in 1993. I listed his name hoping that it’d get indexed and that at some time in the future he’d Google himself and find that I was looking for him. This is exactly what happened. Some people feel self-conscious about Googling themselves, which is crazy. It is the one sure bet you can make: people will Google their own names (and download naughty things, I suppose). This behavior is so natural that if you have your name on a page with another’s name you can be fairly certain the other will see it at some point in the future. Sort of like posting a note for a person to find out in the wilderness. But found it will be, eventually.

Can you tell what photos of a fan-powered Santa, a stumped computer-user, a truckload of anchovies, and middle-aged Swedes dancing the night away have in common?

tolva.jpg

They are all returned as image results when Googling my last name. Now, I’ve known for a while that my last name is Icelandic for ‘computer,’ but a majority of the images are of construction equipment or bizarre machinery. The Santa hoverpack? No idea.

Think of it as visual tagging or reverse-steganography. Instead of embedding a secret word in images, you deduce the word from the images themselves. What would be great is a Google image upload feature (akin to typing a keyword) that matched submissions against the database and provided you with shared keyword terms.

Flickr has a tag game sorta like this.

Bathroom ethnography

One of the best things about not travelling is settling back into the warm embrace of routine. There I said it. Though the over-routinized make up a huge part of the IT geek pool and though they suffer my lighthearted mockery for it, I will admit here, now, that there is something to be said positively for having a bit of routine in one’s life. For example, going to the bathroom. Now, this may have something to do with my work in China where toilets aren’t — how to say — well, they aren’t toilets at all. Being back in my office in Chicago reminds me how much I love the facilities here. So, having spent some time getting to know them again, I am reminded that others too have very predictable behaviors, especially as they relate to Human Bathroom Interaction (HBI). Here, then, are the gross (ahem) categories into which I put my colleagues, all male, obviously:

The Bold Enterer – This is the guy who slams the bathroom door open and forcefully strides in as though he were The Law come to confront some poker-playing desperado in a dusty saloon. Or perhaps he’s just being strong and willful in case some executive is washing his hands and might take notice of his initiative.

The Stall Jiggler – This is the guy who won’t take no for an answer when he encounters a locked stall door. Buddy, if the door doesn’t give way on the first pull that means there is someone in there. To continue to try to obtain entrance suggests that you know the throne is occupied and causes one to worry about your motives. Back off.

The Spy – Perhaps the opposite of the Jiggler is this guy, who stealths about in the bathroom peering through cracks, looking under stall walls, and generally thinking he is a lot more sly than he is as he seeks to ascertain availability. What’s needed maybe is a red light-green light availability indicator, ala airplane lavatories and old-time Catholic confessionals. And speaking of confessions …

The Chatter – I’m sorry, but I simply don’t approve of cell phone conversations while you are relieving yourself. Do you think the other party can’t hear? Do you think I can’t hear? The sad part is that most of the discussions aren’t personal in nature at all. This guy is carrying on business. While crapping. This is not right.

Mr. Efficient – This is the guy who speeds into the bathroom (not boldy, just hastily), targets the first open stall, and has performed his transaction and washed up in not more than 90 seconds. This man has a goal and he accomplishes it. Task checked off the list. He’s most likely a project manager.

The Turnabout – This is the guy who seeks privacy above all else. He’s related to The Spy but the moment he learns that the stalls are not completely empty he turns on his heel and heads out or, amusingly, stops to wash his hands — surely a communication to the other fellow in the stall saying “you think I left because you were here, but in fact I came in only to stretch my legs and wash up.” Yeah, right.

Any others that I’m missing?

(Life)

immerito_foley.jpg

I’ve recently become part of the Second Life universe. Second Life is a true alternate reality where 3D avatars of real people do nearly all the things you’d expect in a real world community. It isn’t a game per se, unless you consider life itself a kind of game. Live, communicate, buy, sell, interact, build, be. You can pretty much do whatever you want. As with any reality, the happenings are being blogged. There’s even an online architecture review of buildings inside Second Life and a police blotter detailing in-world malfeasance.

Look for me as Immerito Foley. My bald spot flickers as I move around. Presumably this is due to some problem with the graphic texture but I rather like it. Might try that in the real world.

More on Second Life soon, I’d wager.

Missionary ambition

During my junior year in college I fled my home institution of Vanderbilt for a semester abroad in Rome with Loyola University. It was an experience that changed my life. About a year ago I was asked to serve on the board of the Rome Center or LURC as we used to call it. This position has allowed me to get to know Father Mike Garanzini, the charistmatic relatively-new president of the university in Chicago. (This past weekend Garanzini’s turnaround of Loyola was the cover story of the Chicago Tribune Magazine.) Father Mike has big plans for LURC. One idea is really appealing to me. He’s interested in creating something called the Ricci Scholarship, a funded full-year of study abroad for exceptionally talented undergraduates. It would place them in Rome for a semester of study and then, through a partnership with Fordham University, move them to Beijing to finish the year. The goal would be a comparative assessment of business, art, mathematics, history, you-name-it and the outcome would be a senior year thesis on the same. It is a bold idea, but one that will likely work given the long history of respect in China that Jesuits enjoy in the country. Named for the missionary Matteo Ricci and undertaken in the spirit of synthesis of East and West the program may begin as early as 2007. With the western world so eager to crack the nut that is Chinese culture and business and with China determined to spread Mandarin around the world this seems very timely.

Unrelated but personally interesting is an exhibit at the Loyola Museum of Art, which I only learned of today. It presents works of Caravaggio as digital replicas per se in a darkened gallery using high-res display monitors. This is the first that I know of bringing the virtual inside the physical so literally. I haven’t seen it yet, but I’m eager to know what happens to the sense of aura that standing in front of a tangible artwork produces when you’re once removed from it. I can’t imagine it is any less real than standing 30 people back gazing at the diminuitive Mona Lisa encased behind bulletproof glass.

I heard a rumor

Last night the house on our part of the block one street over burnt down. As I’ve come to expect from our city’s first responders, the number of emergency vehicles might have caused you to think that an entire block had been napalmed. Dozens of fire engines and even more squad cars clogged every part of Damen Ave. from Belmont to Roscoe. Curious, of course, I sidled up to a group of bystanders listening to a cop. Here’s the gist.

Cop: “… firecracker.”

Me: “Hey, I live one block over. Is everyone OK? Did you just say this was caused by a firecracker?”

Cop: “Yeah, everyone’s fine. No, firecracker is what we call people who flip us the bird from the window like that woman over there.” Points.

Me: “How did this happen?”

Bystander: “I don’t want to start any rumors, but she had a lot of cats. Lots of cats.”

Me: “Cats don’t start fires.”

Bystander: “Look, that’s all I’m gonna say. I don’t like rumors. But she has a lot of cats and she’s been in the news. If you know what I mean.”

Me: Pause. “My house got a little wet from the fire hoses. Could have been worse I guess.”

Same Bystander: “Oh yeah? Any water damage? Here’s my card. I’m an adjuster.”

Me: “My god, you’re like an ambulance chaser for fires.”

Bystander: “Hey, I live in the neighborhood.”

Taikographs

My pal Victor in Beijing presented me with this set of signed commemorative postcards from China’s first two manned spaceflights. The outer envelope, pictured here, contains the signatures of Yang Liwei, China’s first man in space, and Fei Junlong and Nie Haisheng, the occupants of the second ship up. Inside are three separate cards corresponding to the individual taikonauts, also signed.


JNT001_sm.jpg

Victor got the autographs because he works closely with accessibility organizations in China and so he knows the head of the China Disabled Persons’ Federation, Deng Pufang, the son of Deng Xiaoping. With a dad like that Deng Pufang of course has friends in high places and thus were Victor and the spacemen at the same reception. Deng Pufang, by the way, became a paraplegic during the Cultural Revolution as the result of falling from a fourth floor window to escape torture.

The discards of Los Alamos

DSC00079.jpg

I’ve spent much of the past week hearing about the latest in museum technology. There were even organized outings to the museums in and around Albuquerque for us to get a gander firsthand. Strangely none of the organized tours included The Black Hole Museum of Nuclear Waste in Los Alamos.

Run for over 50 years by a guy named Edward Grothus, the museum is more like the backlot of a Mad Max film. In fact, in an irony I am certain is not lost on Grothus the place looks exactly like some archaeology dig where future humans are uncovering the remains of a once-great society’s technology after a nuclear catastrophe. He has built, in other words, that which he hopes to prevent. You might think a “museum” to the scraps of Los Alamos is some kind of reverential exercise, but there’s actually a peace theme that runs throughout, as if Grothus were hoarding all this utterly useless stuff (vials of Liquid Paper!) because he doesn’t want its bad karma let loose in the wild. Of course, it does get out; he sells it. But what sells can only be a tiny fraction, because most of the stuff you could simply stroll through Office Depot for. And it is reverential, in a way, as Grothus conducts a “Critical Mass” every Sunday in a huge A-frame “church” next door.

The technological gizmos are the most interesting for sure. All kinds of specialized and worrisome componentry sits amidst computers of bygone eras. It is like a library once-removed where you walk through wondering what documents, equations, and national security communiques issued from the teletypes and keyboards.

A fascinating museum, if ever there was one. Highly recommended. Bugs, I’m glad I took that left turn at Albuquerque.

Photo tour at Flickr.

Ghostface

Was the mask in the Scream trilogy inspired by a cave formation in Bandelier National Monument Park in New Mexico? It’s commonly held to have been inspired by Edvard Munch’s The Scream, but I’m going with the theory that Wes Craven is a hiker.

scream_inspire.jpg

For a good time, call 877-454-0795

DSC00045.jpg

The annual Museums and the Web conference held its opening reception at the New Mexico Museum of Natural History in Albuquerque two nights ago. The dinosaur exhibit — which is to say, most of the museum — featured a cellphone-based tour in two flavors, keypad-activated and voice-response. All you had to do was say the number or name of the exhibit and voila! But here’s the key point: the tour itself was put together only hours earlier in a conference workshop by museum professionals, podcast-style. This is really quite revolutionary since it shows a real speed-to-market (so to speak) and flexibility of audio tours that previously had not existed. Guerrilla museum tour creation. Yet another example of the web experience for content creators and visitors infiltrating the physical museum space. Wonderful!

And don’t forget to say “Gigantism.” Not only because it triggers the audio, but because it is a lovely word.

Dayjob

I’m just back from the annual gathering of my particular tribe inside of IBM and I figured I’d take the time to tell you, loyal readers, actually what I do for a living. I’ve occasionally mentioned projects here but never actually talked about what I do. This is not because of some corporate policy. In fact, IBM’s external blogging guidelines are some of the most liberal in the industry. Many of our executives blog externally and quite candidly. Internally, blogs thrive for personal use, project teams, and professional topics.

I work for IBM’s Corporate Community Relations, a name which really doesn’t do a good job of describing our mission in the company. In a nutshell, we’re the group responsible for demonstrating innovation that matters to the world (as opposed to innovation that matters only to our company or to our customers, for example). Our programs are what might have traditionally been considered philanthropy or corporate social responsibility, but really that suggests a disconnect from the business itself. IBM Corporate Community Relations is not a function of corporate marketing but rather a group within our Innovation and Technology management line. Why is this important? Because we don’t view corporate citizenship as merely an extension of our brand. Of course, it is that in part — what you do is as much your brand as any logo or slogan — but addressing social, educational, and humanitarian problems is a lot more important than marketing. As a company of 330,000 employees in over 170 countries our “community relations” efforts have to amount to more than sponsoring the local Little League team or cutting checks to charities. Here’s a smattering of what we do.

On Demand Community – IBM’s tool for matching employees to community volunteer efforts and for preparing them with materials and training. Hours volunteered earn credit towards making a cash grant to the community organization. Amazingly successful: 60,000 employees are signed on as volunteers with over half coming from outside the US. Over 3,000,000 volunteer hours logged since the end of 2003.

Transition to Teaching – First-of-its-kind program to address the shortage of high quality math and science teachers in America. As part of the pilot IBM will pay the tuition of employees interested in leaving IBM for a career in education.

World Community Grid – Our program for solving computation-intensive projects in the life sciences. The current project FightAids@Home allows people all over the world to contribute idle processing power on their own machines to create a distributed virtual supercomputer powering the search for a cure for AIDS.

TryScience – Long-running science meta-museum with activities and virtual field trips for children and educators. Also a successful kiosk program distibuted to museums worldwide.

Web Adaptation – Project to donate accessibility technology for web users with vision and/or motor skills impairment.

KidSmart Early Learning Program – Early childhood education initiative which includes the KidSmart learning guide site and donations of Young Explorer computer systems to schools around the world.

¡TradúceloAhora! – Education-focused automatic online machine translation for English and Spanish, soon to providing instant e-mail translation.

IBM Crisis Response – Among the myriad ways IBM assisted during the Asian tsunami and US hurricane disasters of the past year, we shipped thousands of biometrically-enabled PC’s for tracking of displaced persons that tied into a system for first-responders and aid organizations to use during recovery. For Katrina, among other things, we developed the employment opportunity portal called Jobs4Recovery. Unlike many companies, IBM refused to capitalize on the public relations aspects of recovery assistance, which is why you won’t find much information about our crisis programs.

The Genographic Project – Supercool collaboration with National Geographic to map the dispersal patterns of humans out of Africa (and by extension the nature of human diversity) by analyzing the inherited mutations in indigenous peoples worldwide. Public participation is encouraged; you can swab your cheek for placement on the world migration maps. Think of it as macrogenealogy.

Eternal Egypt – Must I tell you more about this?

Well I suppose I didn’t answer the question about what I do, in particular. For the valiant few who have made it this far in a too-long post, I’ll note that I manage all the programs in CCR that relate to cultural heritage. This includes, obviously, Eternal Egypt above plus two truly exciting new projects which I can’t yet talk about but which very careful readers of this site might have an inkling about. I work with project managers, developers, and designers and of course with our partners to deliver these types of projects. It is a great gig, I have to admit, getting to work in high technology and culture at the same time.

Recently, our CEO Sam Palmisano remarked that “the world won’t look at you as a great company if all you do is make a lot of money.” I suppose you could say that the goal of my team in IBM is to make it that great company.

My goodness, you’d think I was paid to do that. What ever happened to bloggers who dish the dirt on their employers?

Less feel-good posts coming, promise.